Tag Archives: dementia home care

The $pending of the Green

On this St. Patrick’s weekend, we seen green everywhere — even in the new leaves on the trees. But if you are a caregiver for someone with dementia, you’re probably preoccupied with a different kind of green — the U.S. dollar variety which can be consumed very quickly by dementia care. The next few articles on this site will discuss some factors that may help you stretch your resources.

Every day I thank the moon and stars that my mom planned her financial future with so much care. She was not a wealthy person, but she worked hard all her life and maximized her retirement savings. As her power of attorney, I feel that it’s my job to be a good steward of her resources and — with my sister’s help — I keep trying to anticipate her future needs as we manage current ones. A few basic factors can make all the difference between balanced financial management and disaster.

1) Long Term Care Policies — Our Mom bought a good one through AARP a long time ago. Thank heaven for that! We have been able to use those resources to pay for adult day services and the occasional caregiver break  for me. These funds allowed us to provide her with very good care at minimal cost for nearly two years. The same amount of money would have purchased just three months of care in a private nursing home. If dementia runs in your family, I suggest that you do some research on these policies now and consider buying one for yourself. But be sure you check out the fine print on benefit payments before you sign a payment agreement. If your loved one already has a policy, shop around and see what programs and services are covered. Do some projections to ballpark the long term costs.

2) Get the best, most specific diagnosis. The hardest aspect of financial planning is uncertainty over the duration of the disease. If your loved one has a straightforward case of Alzheimer’s, you may be providing care for a long time. You’ll need to forecast how much and what kind of care you want to buy. Other types of dementia, however, often have a shorter course of development, but may need more intensive services. The only way you can plan well is by getting a diagnosis that is specific enough to help you predict the symptomatic path of the disease. If you are just working with a family physician, you might want to start looking for more specialized diagnostic services at a regional Memory Center. It’s worth the effort to get a more detailed diagnosis. Medicare will usually cover diagnostic visits to a specialized dementia doctor. (But always check first!)

3. Settle your family business. If you are a member of a family — and who isn’t? — then you know that no matter how much people love each other, there are often disagreements about assets, who will control them, and how they should be used. Too many times people carry childhood grudges into adulthood. And families keep adding members all the time (grandchildren, in-laws, ex-in-laws, etc.) so there is literally no end to the potential number of disagreements that can be triggered by asset questions. Now is the perfect time to call a truce. And ENFORCE it! The more you can get family members to agree around a plan of care, the better off you’ll be. Get everyone to collect information about nursing homes, home-based care, and regional care options as a group. Then sit down and share the information. If decisions are made in haste by one person, some family members may get embittered because they’ve been left out of the process.  Try to find your common ground before the disease backs you into a corner.

The most important thing you can do as a family is work together on behalf of those you love. Property has a value that is vital to the care equation — but love is all you have left once that property is gone. Don’t squander it!



Winter Complicates Care

Readers who live in warm, sunny places might never realize how weather complicates care in cold, snowy climates. Here in the Poconos, January temperatures can sink into the low teens and snow is a constant threat. This year has been mild, but last year I think we paid our plowman enough to put his kids through Harvard.

I used to love snow, and that’s part of why I live here. But my mom hates cold weather and she is terrified of slipping. Since we live in the woods, access to doctors is limited when our roads freeze. We’ve also lost electricity three or four times this year when the power lines were knocked down by falling frozen branches.

Dementia patients don’t do well when these unexpected problems occur. Twice I had to pack up and take Mom to a nearby inn for the night because we had no heat. Changing her routine makes life very hard for her because that’s all she has left to help her make sense of the world. Fortunately, the Inn at Jim Thorpe helped us get a discounted room right away so I could keep her comfortable and warm and reduce the amount of chaos around her. But I know there are caregivers out there who’ve faced far greater challenges.

Patients bound to wheelchairs have transportation issues when there’s snow and ice on the ground. People who use walkers can’t move well in heavy precipitation. And what about the extra clothes we have to pile on and keep track of for our loved one? Gloves, boots, and scarves give us a new laundry list of things we must remember for them.

Despite it’s troublesome aspects, I still think snow is beautiful. But I’d never say that about a hurricane. Caring for my mom has made me think about the people who tried to save the sick and elderly during Hurricane Katrina. You wonder how anyone with dementia could have survived the threat of those rising waters. Given the choice of helping my mom through a flood or a blizzard, I’d take a foot of snow any day. And I sincerely hope that our comrades in hurricane zones never face another human disaster like Katrina.